COMMONWEALTH OF MASSACHUSETTS
NORFOLK , SS SUPERIOR COURT
COUNT ONE (To establish a mechanic’s lien under C. 254 of the General Laws)
PROPERTY ADDRESS: 555 COMMON ST., PERU , MA
Notice of Contract filing:
Statement of Account filing:
1. Pick-up Truck with Two Magnetic Signs, Inc. (Poor Sub) is a Massachusetts corporation with a usual place of business in Amesbury, Massachusetts, County of Essex. Poor Sub is widely regarded as the pre-eminent furnisher and installer of Whoopee lasers and Whoopetrons in New England and surrounding states. As a point of information, without the installation of several sizes of Whoopee lasers and other Whoopee parts in a Whoopee Parlor, no one is able to make Whoopee, thus forcing all potential customers to endure lonely and boring and generally unsatisfactory Friday and Saturday nights, therein consuming massive quantities of Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream, thus causing said potential customers to vote Democrat or worse in all state and federal elections.
2. Hardly Pay Ever Construction Corporation (Rolling in Dough) is a Massachusetts corporation with a usual place of business in a castle with a moat infested with hungry alligators in Wellesley Hills, Massachusetts, County of Norfolk. Prior to the construction of Project, as hereinafter described, Rolling in Dough had never built or handled Whoopee lasers and Whoopetrons, only getting into this business because of very high margins and a reputed satisfactory construction experience for all those involved with such work.
3. Hope I Don’t Get Liened Corporation (Hope) is a Massachusetts corporation with a usual place of business in Peru, MA, County of Norfolk. As a point of information, Hope is only concerned with the making of Whoopee and, in fact, operates several Whoopee parlors in various Massachusetts towns but not in Dover, because Whoopee parlors can not be located in Dover by town regulation (unless it can be proved that the owner of the Whoopee parlor came over on the Mayflower or otherwise is worth seven figures, not counting cents.)
4. Poor Sub entered into a subcontract with Rolling in Dough dated October 17, 2004 whereby Poor Sub would furnish labor and materials and equipment for the construction of a Whoopee Parlor at Hope’s Peru facility (Project) including, but not limited to, the supply and installation of various Whoopee parts, lasers and Whoopetrons - Project essentially being a Whoopee park. Specifically, and as a point of information, Poor Sub was to supply and very gently install various Whoopee lasers, which are required for the satisfactory and satisfying operation of a Whoopee Parlor, and some Whoopetrons, all in new and clean condition.
5. Poor Sub has properly performed its subcontract work and there is due and owing to Poor Sub approximately $353,392 for its construction activities, which is the amount indicated in Poor Sub’s statement of account. This amount represents the fair and reasonable value of the labor and materials and equipment Poor Sub has furnished to Project for which it has not been paid. (Poor Sub had also ordered for Project four extra Whoopetrons in small, medium, large and 6X sizes - in the construction of Whoopee Parlors, size indeed matters - three of which it was able to return to the manufacturer for credit and one of which it was not able to return due to the fact it was slightly used and had a variety of blemishes and which Poor Sub, therefore, was forced to retain for its own personal and private uses and for the purposes of holding classes to instruct other Whoopetron installers and dealers in the art and science of Whoopee .)
6. Rolling in Dough is in breach of its contractual obligations to Poor Sub as to the contract alleged above. Poor Sub has substantially completed its contract performance in its entirety and Rolling in Dough has refused to pay Poor Sub’s rightful bill. Upon information and belief, Rolling in Dough has taken these monies otherwise due Poor Sub and has used them to pay its off-track investment adviser, in payment of/compensation for various unwise investments it made late on four successive Saturday nights while under a state of substantial inebriation in houses of ill repute.
7. All of the materials furnished by the plaintiff were used in the construction of the Whoopee Parlor in question and were furnished in reliance on plaintiff’s notice and/or plaintiff’s right to claim notice of contract and a mechanic’s lien under Massachusetts law. Moreover, while employing Plaintiff’s materials, all residents of and visitors to Peru, Massachusetts are able to make lots and lots of Whoopee but not, as further alleged above, in the very extra large sizes some customers require.
8. Poor Sub has performed all conditions precedent required of it and all conditions precedent to the maintenance of this suit have occurred. Poor Sub has timely filed a notice of contract and a statement of account and has otherwise complied with the requirements of C. 254 of the General Laws for the purposes of filing this mechanic’s lien, copies of which are attached hereto as Exhibits A and B.
WHEREFORE, Plaintiff Pick-up Truck with Two Magnetic Signs, Inc. demands judgment for all damages, monies, costs, interest fees and counsel fees to which it is entitled after a hearing on this matter against Hardly Pay Ever Construction Corporation and against Hope I Don’t Get Liened Corporation.
FURTHER, PLAINTIFF DEMANDS JUDGMENT THAT:
I. The amount due the plaintiff by reason of its furnishing the aforesaid labor, materials and equipment be determined and that it have judgment thereon for its costs;
II. That the plaintiff’s lien on the real estate be established;
III. That the rights of all other interested persons who are or may become parties be adjudicated;
IV. That the interests in the real estate subject to the lien be sold and the proceeds applied to the satisfaction of the plaintiff’s lien, judgment, and its costs for establishing and enforcing said lien along with all prejudgment interest and attorney’s fees; and
V. That all of plaintiff’s Whoopee lasers, Whoopetrons and appurtenant materials be returned to the plaintiff in a clean and sanitary condition; and,
VI. The Court order such further relief as justice and the rights of the parties require including, without limitation, compensation for all of the Whoopee trips that have been made through the various Whoopetrons located at Project heretofore.
1-8. Poor Sub realleges Paragraphs 1-8 of Count One as Paragraphs 1-8 of Count Two as if fully set forth herein.
WHEREFORE, Plaintiff Pick-up Truck with Two Magnetic Signs, Inc. demands judgment for all damages, monies, costs, interest fees and counsel fees to which it is entitled after a hearing on this matter against Hardly Pay Ever Construction Corporation.
1-8. Poor Sub realleges Paragraphs 1-8 of Count One as Paragraphs 1-8 of Count Three as if fully set forth herein.
WHEREFORE, Plaintiff Pick-up Truck with Two Magnetic Signs, Inc. demands judgment for all damages, monies, costs, interest fees and counsel fees to which it is entitled after a hearing on this matter against Defendant Hardly Pay Ever Construction Corporation.
1-8. Poor Sub realleges Paragraphs 1-8 of Count One as Paragraphs 1-8 of Count Four as if fully set forth herein.
9. At times material hereto, both Poor Sub and Rolling in Dough have been and are engaged in trade or commerce in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts.
10. Rolling in Dough has engaged in various unfair and deceptive trade practices as to Poor Sub in violation of, inter alia, Sections 2(a) and 11 of C. 93A of the General Laws. Without limitation, said practices include: (a) Rolling in Dough induced, directed and forced Poor Sub to install a better grade of Whoopee laser and Whoopetron than was required by the contract documents for Project and then further attempted to backcharge Poor Sub for the higher energy costs sustained due to the operation of the larger Whoopetrons; (b) went through a mediation process and agreed with the recommendation of the mediator only to later renege on that agreement; (c) not pay Poor Sub in accordance with contract terms; (d) not giving Poor Sub timely and adequate access to the Whoopetrons so that Poor Sub, other than being un-compensated, remains in a state of being generally lonely and unfulfilled; (e) by performing these acts, making it impossible to for Poor Sub to pay two subcontractors/suppliers (scented Whoopee oils and massage rollers), which may be in the process of suing Poor Sub; (f) now attempting to hold Poor Sub to perform to the standards of a Swiss Engineer who is, upon information and belief, is not licensed in Massachusetts and, basically, specializes in the construction of Whoopee lasers and Whoopetrons in Swiss chalets, which are largely dissimilar to Whoopetrons installed in the United States due to wildly disparate temperature swings and the the excessive use of chocolate in the inducement mechanisms of Swiss Whoopetrons, which basically really screw up the plumbing on American Whoopetrons; (g) treating Poor Sub in a shoddy manner, particularly calling Poor Sub ‘stupid’ and a ‘loser’ and a ‘dork’ in front of customers and other subcontractors, it being understood, however, that truth is a defense to libel claims absent malice and a court might find some truth to certain aspects of such statements; (h) through excessive mismanagement of Project, exposed Poor Sub employees to suffer excessive rays from the Whoopetron lasers, thus threatening the further fertility of Poor Sub’s employees and also causing all residents of Peru within three miles of the Whoopee Parlor to develop various leaking warts in very personal places polite people simply never discuss.
11. As a result of the unfair and deceptive practices referenced above by example only, Poor Sub has been damaged.
WHEREFORE, Plaintiff Pick-up Truck with Two Magnetic Signs, Inc. demands judgment for all damages, monies, costs, interest fees and counsel fees to which it is entitled after a hearing on this matter against Defendant Hardly Pay Ever Construction Corporation plus double or treble damages in accordance with the provisions of C. 93A, s.11 of the General Laws and actual attorneys’ fees.